The five stages of divorce recovery.
Photo by RODNAE Productions
Divorce equals the loss of a beloved person for many divorcees. It takes much time and effort to heal the shattered heart and go back to a normal life after your marriage comes to an end. Almost every person proceeds through the divorce healing stages before they can finally plan and implement the future with confidence. And if you fail to live through the stages efficiently, you may get lost in them going in the cycle and spoiling you’re being gradual.
Discover the art of divorce recovery by learning more about the divorce recovery stages and the tips to deal with them. This will let you leave your marriage failure behind and progress personally for the sake of a successful future.
What are 5 divorce recovery stages
What Are 5 Divorce Recovery Stages
Whether divorce in Philadelphia has come to you abruptly or you subconsciously knew that your relationships don’t work properly but never wanted to admit it, even if the marriage termination happens it hurts badly. Divorcees suffer so much that they go through the five stages of grief similar to what they feel about death or the serious disease of a close person.
Here is what happens to an average participant in the divorce process:
Denial
The shock of the marriage going to an end is so big that the divorcee prefers to deny or ignore the truth they are not ready to accept. It is easier for them to live on without accepting the divorce as it is but mechanically going through the process. Denial is usually a way to defend oneself from the pain of loss and related suffering. It is dangerous to stay in denial and suppress the emotions and feeling about marriage termination since the moment when it floods you may bring even more destruction than the divorce itself.
Anger
Then when a person realizes that they are not married anymore and it changes their life drastically, they obviously get really mad. Some may claim that this is one of the stages of divorce recovery for men but not women. But the truth is that everyone may feel angry and even get aggressive when years of relationships are wasted with no positive results in the end.
Here it is necessary to understand that it is normal to feel angry at everyone and everything. Your task is to find an efficient let-out for your emotions so that they don’t amass and poison your life afterward.
Bargaining
As the volcano of the initial strong reaction dies out a divorcee is left with the realization that divorce is here, it ends their marriage, and they are left on their own. They come with the last desperate trial to save their relationships by all means. The divorcee may even beg their partner to give another chance to their marriage, visit a therapist, or stay together for the kids. They are so scared of staying alone that they look for every possible way to preserve their relationships.
The truth is that you shouldn’t waste your time and effort on saving the marriage which doesn’t work for a long time already. It is better to use the energy for healing and recovery. But it may be difficult to understand and accept it on your own.
Depression
When bargaining doesn’t work, or when a couple comes to a compromise but it doesn’t help the relationship anyway, depression arrives. A person feels disappointed about continuous failures, fears loneliness, and neglects any help. Self-isolation and mourning seem to be the only cure for a broken heart. Often, it does.
If you need to mourn, then mourn, if you need to stay on your own, lock your doors and switch off your phone, if you need to cry your eyes out, get a pack of tissues and go on. This is one of the key steps to recovery you have to go through. Yet, don’t reject help and support at this very moment otherwise you may get stuck in a depressive mood and ruin your life even more.
Acceptance
With all the emotions and feelings about your failed relationships gone away and most of the stages of divorce recovery behind you, you are finally ready for your new life. This is what acceptance will grant you. You are ready to realize the truth, accept your new environment, reinvent yourself, and move forward. You can now let your past go, fix your present, and welcome your future.
How to go through divorce stages
It may be overwhelming to go through the stages of divorce on your own. The abundance of feelings and emotions may suffocate a divorcee preventing them from coping with daily issues and moving on. This makes it necessary to gather a support team around you and follow simple guidance. Review the tips that may help you out:
- care about yourself
- feel grateful for the things you have
- find happiness in little things
- avoid bad habits
- be reserved with social media
- be kind to yourself
- communicate more with your children and close people
- reach professional help
These and similar practices will help you stay strong and brave when going through 5 stages of healing. As a result, you won’t get stuck at any of them, get rid of your past, and move forward with confidence. Remember that you have good people around you to lean on, accept their help and you will reach your happiness one day.